[DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN]

Dustin frowned as he heard the ringtone of his phone, debating answering and then deciding against it. His hands were covered in oil from the truck engine he was bent over and if it was important someone would leave a message. Turning his attention back to his rust bucket he returned to tinkering with it, trying to fix its latest issue. The truck was old, it had been the only car he could afford when they came over and though it was slowly falling apart it was sentimental to him, and he was old fashioned in the way he disliked spending money liberally if it could be avoided. He was good with cars so it was cheaper to keep patching it up than it was to scrap and buy a new one.

His phone rang again. This time Dustin straightened up, careful not to smack his head on the bonnet, and grabbed a cloth to wipe his hands on. A sense of foreboding hit him as he hurried over to catch the call. It was unusual for it to ring twice, and he would be pissed it happened to be a cold caller. Checking the number his brow furrowed. He knew that number, and dread settled in the pit of his stomach. Why would they be calling? Answering it briskly he exchanged brief hellos with his commanding officer. "I won't beat around the bush Officer Mccarran, this is not a social call. You are required back in service as of 14th May."

Dustins heart threw itself into overdrive. What?! Returning to active duty? Impossible. "I'm on indefinite leave, sir. Due to injury. This must be a mistake." his voice was firm and cool despite the fact he felt anything but inside. "no mistake, mccarran. This is a direct order, you will be returning to active duty in two weeks." Dustin shook his head. This was ridiculous. Two weeks to pack his life up and go back to France to fight for an army that was forcing him to do so? He tried to argue but he was getting nowhere. He wasn't entirely sure how legal this was but he was willing to find out. He couldn't leave now, not with the babies, not with Holly and Avery, and Heather. In the end he managed to get one tiny bit of leeway and set up a meeting with those in charge of the decision... A meeting booked for tomorrow. He would have to find his way to France tonight. It wasn't ideal but he couldn't just accept this and leave. Hanging up once the conversation was over he put the phone down, frustration taking over. He couldn't help himself as he grabbed a spanner from the work top and threw it across the garage, watching as it clattered into a shelf and sent everything flying.

[HAYDEN MAY JAMES]

DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN

hayden hummed as she chopped up various vegetables for the salad they were going to be having later that night. she'd finally calmed dean down enough so that he was sitting at the kitchen table across from her, coloring in a book and telling her all about the animals that he was finding and drawing over. sliding the carrots she'd just chopped into the bowl she mixed it up, deciding when the best time to put the meat in the oven would be. since the kids would be eating with them she didn't want to leave it too late but too early would mean there would be anarchy just a few hours later. popping the bowl into the fridge she brushed her hands together and wiped them against her jeans. most of the work for tonight was done now, heck she might even ask dustin to fire up the barbecue to cook the meat just for something different. "why don't you go get your football, sweetheart?" she said, walking over to dean and running her fingers over his hair. "i'll go see if dad's free and if he wants to play with us, and if he can't just yet, we'll see if i can get the ball past you." she said, smiling as he scurried off the table, clutching his colouring book to his chest as he ran upstairs.

she made her way outside, slipping her feet into sneakers as she did and she crossed to the garage where dustin was working on his car. she'd tried talking to him about buying a new one in a round about way but his mind was set. she brushed her hair back from her hair, taking her time to walk across the grass, enjoying the feeling of the warmth on her neck, the sun shining down. she almost stopped so she could take a few deep breaths but a crash from the garage had her worried and she quickened her pace to a jog. she hurried inside and her face scrunched into a frown as she saw dustin. he was upset, that was easy enough to see but at what was a whole different story. "dustin?" she said, letting him know she was there in case the sound of her footsteps had eluded him in the state he was in. she closed the distance between them, reaching out to lay a hand on his arm, her eyes gazing to the floor that was covered in stuff. "babe, what happened?"

[DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN]

"dustin?" He sighed, running a firm hand on his face and for a moment, pinching the bridge of his nose between his thumb and his forefinger. He knew it. He knew she'd have heard that - it was his own fault for being that stupid but he'd let the rage get the best of him for a minute, like it did on occasion. He released his hand and let out a long exhale, feeling as though he'd just ages ten years in the last ten seconds. When was this going to end? If it wasn't his problem with the army it was one of his brother's. He'd joined because he'd once believed in the cause, but he didn't anymore. The army had failed, he'd been driven out of his home, he'd seen people die - kids die - for the sake of other people's fights, and he'd had to practically smuggle his family into another country and start afresh all over again. He had family to look after, he had a permanent limp, he didn't love the army like he once had as a young man, and he never would again. He couldn't go back.

He looked across as Hayden reached him, her hand on his arm. He wasn't in the right frame of mind to be calmed right now, he needed to sort this out. He gently pulled away; it wasn't personal, but he just needed a little space to sort himself out. "babe, what happened?" His mouth twisted slightly, a quick internal debate about what he wanted to tell her and what he wanted to keep to himself. He didn't want to lie, he hated lying, but he wasn't prepared to worry her if he could fix this. "I have to go to France for a meeting tomorrow with my army superiors." He said, keeping it short and simple, he could fi this and it would be all sorted by the evening, and then he could explain it to her without her having to panic.

[HAYDEN MAY JAMES]

DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN

hayden didn't react when dustin moved away from her touch, she withdrew her hand and lowered it to cradle it around the small bump that showed the three month growth of her and dustin's child. she understood there were times when he needed his space, she was okay with that, she could do that for him if that's what he needed. it didn't stop her from worrying about him through, from seeing the tension wound up so tight in him that she worried it would snap and he'd suffer for it. she waited for him to answer her, seeing his mouth twist in some weird way that she'd never seen from him before. her head was playing what could be wrong over in her head, was it something to do with one of his brothers, his sisters or one of his army mates. had the army come calling again? had something gone wrong at work. she knew he would eventually tell her what was the matter, because he always did. dustin didn't lie, he didn't hide things and he didn't conspire behind her back. that was one thing she loved about him, he was honest with her and she showed him the same courtesy when he had a problem.

even though the army had been one of the thoughts swirling around in her head, it still took the wind out of her when he said it. she tightened her hold on her waist slightly and she let out a breath. "they need you there tomorrow?" she asked, clarifying to herself that it was so soon. she chewed her lip for a second before she lifted her gaze back to his face and she nodded slightly. "okay." she said as she forced her shoulders to relax slightly and she dropped her hand from her stomach to her side. "okay then we go to france tonight." she said with a determined voice. she wasn't letting him go on his own, even if she went with him and spent the day holed up in a hotel room, he wasn't leaving the country on his own, especially when there might be bad news waiting for him at the other end.

[DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN]

"they need you there tomorrow?" He nodded, glancing at her to get a proper gauge on her reaction. Her voice hadn't given much away, which meant she was either holding it carefully in rein because of him, or she didn't know what to think of it yet. He could see the thoughts whirling behind her eyes, and he knew what she was going to say before she did. It wasn't happening though, she was absolutely 100% not coming. This was something he needed to do one his own, it was a quick trip in and out of the army and he couldn't have worry in the back of his mind about her - about the travelling, about the baby, about the fact that he wouldn't be able to take her to the meeting with him and she'd be on her own. It wasn't a holiday, this was work, and she just wasn't coming.

"okay." He felt a swell of surprise. Maybe he was wrong, maybe she was just going to accept it for what it was. "okay then we go to france tonight." and there it was. Of course it was. He understood, she loved him, and if the situation was reversed there's no way he could let her go alone... but it was different, because he was a guy. Perhaps it was a sexist view for him to take, but the truth was it was different for a man to travel alone and a women to, particularly a three month pregnant woman. He sighed heavily and shook his head, folding his arms. "No." he said simply, firmly, with no room for argument. "This is work, I need to get it sorted and come home. Sorry Hayden, but it's non negotiable." he'd lock her in the house if he had to, but he wasn't budging an inch on this.

[HAYDEN MAY JAMES]

DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN

he reacted exactly how she'd figured he would. telling her no, that she wasn't going with him. she knew he was just trying to keep her safe and he didn't want her to be dragged into all this and she could understand that. she just wasn't backing down without a fight. as much as his voice sounded like he wanted this part of the conversation to be over she wasn't going to let it be. at least not yet. at least without more of a reason than it being work. "i'm not letting you go alone." she said as she took a step towards him but stopping herself before she got as close to him as she wanted to.

she could give him space when he needed it, sometimes it was just hard to remember to do it. "and i'm sorry but what if they don't let you come home. what if they want to keep you in france?" she said, running a hand over her hair, as she felt herself starting to get more than a little frustrated with the situation. "i can't say goodbye to you in the next few hours, let you go overseas and be terrified that i won't get to see you again for months. don't ask me to do that dustin." she said, her eyes burning at the thought of having to spend the next few hours worrying about that. if she was in france with him and they tried to keep him there, she was at least in the same country. if she was stuck in england, she'd be more of a nervous wreck.

[DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN]

"i'm not letting you go alone." He shook his head, hating that she was arguing him on this. He didn't get more animated when he was saying no, not like some of his siblings did, he didn't shake his head adamantly or stomp his feet, he just got firmer, more solid, more statue-like. "You don't get a choice." he sounded harsh, and he didn't say it nastily, but he said it with no room for argument. "This will be no place for a woman, sorry, but no, and it certainly won't be any place for a child...or had you forgotten our son?" He wasn't playing fair, but he was being honest. He couldn't bring her with him, it would only make things worse for him, and he certainly couldn't bring Dean. "We can't just leave him here on his own without his parents overnight, and I'm sure as hell not uprooting him and flying him to France for one evening for the sake of my meeting. Sorry, not happening."

He stepped away from her, needing his space for a minute. Pushing him was just making it worse, this pent up frustration and he raked a hand through his hair. He could appeal all he wanted but he already knew what the answer would be. If they wanted him back, they'd take him back. He wouldn't get a choice, and they'd wrap it up so tightly in legal jargon that even a laywer from Suits wouldn't be getting him free. "and i'm sorry but what if they don't let you come home. what if they want to keep you in france?" His eyes went hard, he couldn't argue that they wouldn't, but it made it all the more important that she wasn't with him. "So that's your reasoning for coming? So you can live in a hotel room for weeks on end until you give in and come home anyway?" he shook his head. If they didn't quit it would become a full blown row shortly. "i can't say goodbye to you in the next few hours, let you go overseas and be terrified that i won't get to see you again for months. don't ask me to do that dustin." He sighed, and for a moment placed his hands on her cheeks, drawing her eyes to his. "You have to."

[HAYDEN MAY JAMES]

DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN

they didn't fight often, it just wasn't them. she could count on her hands the amount of times they'd had serious arguments and they didn't often last long but when they did it was as if they pushed their heads against the other until one of them gave in. she didn't like it when they fought but sometimes it was inevitable. "don't." she said, her voice gaining heat as she spoke she straightened her back a little. she could forgive him just about anything but there were certain words said that she'd never forget and using their son would be some of them. "if he did stay here i'm sure between holly, avery and heather he'd be fine. he's been without us before so don't act as if he'd fall apart if we weren't there for one night." if she did go with dustin it would kill her to leave him, it would hurt more than anything she could imagine but he'd be none the wiser. he'd just assume they'd be back the next day.

she brushed her hair from her face as he stepped away and she took the chance to take a breath. "my reasoning is i don't want you to have to handle this alone. you shouldn't have to worry about this on your own." which he would. she knew he would, she knew deep down he'd win this argument, that she'd stay and have to say goodbye to him and she'd spend however long he was gone wishing that he was back with them but she couldn't give it up so easily. she chewed her lip slightly as she felt his hands upon her cheek, turning her face into his palms slightly she closed her eyes before feeling him tilt her face up so she could look at his. "i don't want to." she said as she lifted her hands to clasp them gently around his wrists. "i'm not strong enough to say goodbye to you."

[DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN]

"don't." He clenched his jaw, then unclenched, trying to release some of his frustration. He wasn't saying these things to hurt her but to get her to understand. She didn't know this world, he did. He had lived it for years, and he could be living it again. There had been a reason he'd been single in the army and this was it, because he knew army wives out there, and their lives were miserable. It didn't matter that they were in the same country as their husbands, they were still on their own, still had no news for weeks when their husbands went to the front lines, it made no difference except that out there their worlds were so much smaller. He didn't want that for Hayden. She was better here, with his siblings, where they could all look out for each other, help each other, take care of each other, love each other. He needed that. He couldn't have her holed up out there with nobody but him, and then he wouldn't be there. It wasn't the kind of life he wanted for her, or his son.

"if he did stay here i'm sure between holly, avery and heather he'd be fine. he's been without us before so don't act as if he'd fall apart if we weren't there for one night." He shook his head. "It's not fair. You don't pick me over him. It's him, every damn time." He ground out, frowning. He was a big guy, he could look after himself, it wouldn't help him to have her with him, he needed to have his head clear for the meeting, not muddled. Their son should come first in this, hands down. He would pick his son over everyone. No matter what. "my reasoning is i don't want you to have to handle this alone. you shouldn't have to worry about this on your own." He sighed, some of the tension easing from his shoulders, his neck aching with the strain. "Even if you were there, it's still something I have to sort out on my own. It would only make it worse if you were there, because I would have my mind and my heart split worrying about you, when at least here I know you're all safe."

"i don't want to." He let her grab his wrists, gently easing them out of her hold to take her hands in his instead, his touch soft, voice quietening as the argument came to it's end. "i'm not strong enough to say goodbye to you." He shook his head once and caught her gaze in his, firmly. "It's not a goodbye. Just au revoir. It's not a goodbye, it means see you again. I'll be coming back." He promised.

[HEATHER TALLIS MCCARRAN]

DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN & @hayden

dropping her camera light onto the kitchen counter, heather glanced around the house quickly and wondered why it was so quiet. there should be at least three people cluttering up the place by now. unless plans had changed and she was on her own for dinner. she hoped not, not that she couldn't eat alone it was just nice not to. taking off her jacket she tossed it across the back of one of the kitchen chairs and she brushed some hair back from her forehead. she heard a small cheer from the backyard and she smiled as she went to the window. if dean was around, then that would mean at least hayden or dustin were about the house somewhere. she headed out the back and watched dean kick the ball towards the little set of goals he had. "you're gonna be a football player when you grow up?" she asked as she walked over to him.

he abandoned his game, for at least a few moments, to run over and greet her and she scooped him up into his arms, grunting a little as she did. "your mum needs to stop feeding you." she said as she tickled him lightly. over his giggles she heard voices coming from the garage at the back of their garden. So that's where they were. heather was about to set dean down and play ball with him again when something in the tone of the voices changed and she stopped to listen for just a second. she didn't often eavesdrop on her siblings, but she did when it sounded like something was wrong. and as someone who was well used to getting bad news about her family, she was attuned to picking it up. she set dean down and ruffled his hair lightly, "how about you go in and watch tv? while your mum and dad aren't watching." she said with a small smile as she watched him run inside to the coveted tv. crossing the garden she stood in the doorway to the garage, resting a hand on the frame of the door as she laid eyes on her brother and his partner. "what's wrong? where do you have to come back from?"

[HAYDEN MAY JAMES]

DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN

she tightened her fingers around his as he took a hold of her hands, his touch soft but firm. she needed that, she needed that steadiness that was dustin. it always seemed like the world could fall apart and he'd be there, his calm self and knowing just what to do. of course she knew he had his moments, there was weakness behind his facade, he just didn't let it show to everyone. she knew about it though, she slept beside him, felt his dreams and the nightmares and terrors that sometimes plagued him when he was supposed to be escaping. she rubbed her fingers across his knuckles gently as she nodded softly, chewing the corner of her lip lightly as she looked up at him. "it had better be." she said softly as she stepped closer to him. "god leave it to the army to ruin what should be a happy time." she said as she let go of one of his hands to snake her arm around his shoulders to the back of his neck.

she took a breath and tried to let go of any feeling of wanting to fight and scream about what was about to happen. she wanted to, she wanted to let loose on the powers that be, wanted to ask what right they had to try and pull apart their family but she couldn't. she could just hope for the best. she rubbed her fingers against the back of his neck, her intuition telling her that's where he'd be carrying the tension of the news. she heard heather before she saw her, her voice filling the garage as she asked what was wrong. heather dropped her hand from dustin's neck and rested it on his shoulder lightly as she half turned to look at his little sister. "uh.." she could only get out as she looked back at dustin, unsure of what he'd been planning on telling siblings, not that he'd had much time to plan anything since getting the phone call.

[DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN]

He squeezed her fingers back, the fight leaving him as he felt it leave her - tension slowly seeping out, leaving behind a numbing unhappiness. He thought he had been able to leave the army behind but he realised now that had been naive. They would never let him leave, not really - he was too useful. Avery was safe, they couldn't call on him after his accident, even though he was walking again - but Dustin with his minor injury was able to be called upon whenever they required. It was shit, nothing else to say for it. "it had better be. God leave it to the army to ruin what should be a happy time." He wrapped his arms around her and drew her close, resting his chin on the top of her head. "It'll be fine, I promise you."

"what's wrong? where do you have to come back from?" Dustin frowned and pulled back from Hayden as he heard his youngest siblings voice, glancing over at her in the doorway. You shouldn't have been eavesdropping." His frown deepened, brows almost pulled together. He didn't want to do this here and now - he'd wanted to bring all of his siblings together to tell, when he'd had time to compose himself, but he knew Heather, she'd be a dog with a bone until he told her what was going on. "The army have called me back," He hesitated, letting it sink in a for a moment. "I'm going back to discuss with them, but I'll be gone for a couple of weeks whilst I sort this."

[HEATHER TALLIS MCCARRAN]

DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN & @hayden

should she have been listening? no. she did know that. she she also know that their family wasn't able to keep their nose out other peoples business. she watched as the two of them pulled apart and if she wasn't so worried about where her brother might need to come back from that she might have felt a little guilty for interrupting them but the second she'd heard their voices she'd had a sinking feeling in her stomach and she knew from past experience that it was a feeling that would lead her to devastation. "you don't get to warn me about boundaries and privacy dustin."

whatever she'd been expecting her brother to tell her, it wasn't that. the army was something of a difficult topic in her family. it had taken her brothers away from her when she'd needed them most, the army they'd served had played a part in the battle that had killed their parents and then it had caused fights amongst them when she'd wanted to join her brothers and play her own part in the service.

"tell them you can't go. you've been out for years. they can't just call you back now." she said as she stepped into the shed, within arms reach of both dustin and hayden. she looked between both of them and shook her head a little. "you don't even live in france anymore. what do they want you to do? just ... drop everything and go." she said as she frowned. "and you want to go alone?" she knew her brother, she was almost certain he did.

[HAYDEN MAY JAMES]

DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN

she melted into him when he wrapped his arms around her. it was as if all the tension left her body and she pressed herself against his him and rested her head against his chest softly. she closed her eyes as she wrapped her arms around him, holding on him as they stood there in the shed that was so close to their home but seemed so far away from everything right now. well that was until heather poked her head into the shed and stood in the doorway. she dropped her arms from dustin as he pulled away from her but she kept her hand on his arm, hoping to keep grounding him in the moment. she didn't take sides when it came to the arguments dustin and his sister had, staying something like switzerland as they tried to tear each other apart, but this was a little different.

it was clear to her that dustin didn't want to have this conversation but it seemed like he was going to have it regardless. she let go of his arm and she shifted her hand to rest it on his lower back lightly, just so that he knew she was there if he needed her. she'd also understand if he stepped away from her touch, more than used to understanding how dustin dealt with difficult feelings and situations. "how about we do this over dinner? you both take some time to think and then once everyone is home you can talk about it?" she offered as something of a solution to the argument that felt like it was about to break out.

[DUSTIN GASPARD MCCARRAN]

He felt Hayden melt against his body and he pulled her a little tighter to him, a silent apology - not just for the argument, but for the situation. He hated hurting her, and this was doing exactly that. He took a small step back as Heather abruptly entered the conversation, letting out a heavy sigh. "you don't get to warn me about boundaries and privacy dustin." His expression shut down slightly, as was always his habit whenever he had to do something unpleasant - steeling himself for firm or difficult conversations. "Yes, I do." He might not be Heather's father, but he was as close as he could get - since their parents had passed several years ago, he had taken care of his siblings as a brother and a father would, taking on both roles with utmost care and a slightly heavy heart - he hated being the bad guy, but somebody had to.

"tell them you can't go. you've been out for years. they can't just call you back now." Dustin pressed his lips together, if only it were that simple - but Heather wasn't part of the army, and he'd always kept that part of his life as separate as possible to his siblings; there were things they didn't need to know. "you don't even live in france anymore. what do they want you to do? just ... drop everything and go." Dustin nodded, "Yes, it's not as simple as saying 'I don't want to'. I could be labelled as a deserter if I don't go, and that would be worse." It would mean jail time, going back would be difficult but not as difficult as being behind bars. "and you want to go alone?" He nodded again. "I am." His voice left no room for argument, as with Hayden, this was something he would be entering into alone - he would not drag his family to France and back for a meeting which may not even amount to anything.

He felt Hayden's touch at his back and he shot her a grateful look, though he couldn't afford to melt right now. His youngest sister was the most difficult of all the others, and he knew this could turn ugly if he wasn't careful - shut it down early with no room for argument. "how about we do this over dinner? you both take some time to think and then once everyone is home you can talk about it?" Dustin frowned slightly. "This isn't something up for discussion. When everyone is home later I will let them know and confirm the arrangements, but it's not a debate." He warned, he would let them know everything they needed to, roughly where he was going, how to contact him or if they could at all, and when he was expecting to be home.. and what to do if he wasn't back. He knew Avery knew most of it - for example, Dustin had a secret account with money in for emergencies and Av knew how to access if he suddenly disappeared and didn't return - along with all the paperwork for his accounts, his will and the deed to the house.