james could only wish that his kids looked up to him. there were days he worried about whether or not he was even worthy of that. he looked at his kids and sometimes wondered how they'd come from him. he knew they were lexi's, they each had so much of her in them and he couldn't be unhappy about that. he wasn't sure his genes were any that a kid could rave about, his father had made sure of that. of course so had his mother and just about every other adult in their family, but his father was the one he was worried most about. that he would turn out like him, no matter how hard he tried to stop it. "i think the only one i have right now is rory." he said with a chuckle as he sipped his beer. "she's still my girl .. but the boys are being sucked into the superhero world." he was sure that taite's hero was captain america right now.

"then you my frie.. almost brother ... are royally screwed." he said as he raised his glass a little with a laugh. he was joking of course, kind of. he sat there for just a moment, quietly thinking about how most of his family had seemed to find functioning relationships despite the horrors they were brought up with. he knew that he and lexi had their moments and they might have been struggling the last few months, but it was still a far more healthy relationship that he'd seen growing up. he felt oddly proud of his family right then. "have you decided when and how you'll ask her?" he said as he shifted in his seat, leaning forward slightly and turning the glass in his hand. "if you want, lexi and i can have josh for the night or a few days when you do. give you two some time." he loved having josh around, he knew what a godsend being close to your cousins could be as a child.

he chuckled a little and he shook his head slightly. he couldn't believe that damon had actually thought he was serious but then, sometimes he forgot that damon didn't have quite the relationship with his own family that james did. he could joke with logan and leo and they'd get it almost straight away. it had shocked him a little to be found serious when he was joking but he could understand it now. "in some ways i'm glad, it means i might be able to fool my kids when they're teens and i'm telling them something." he joked a little as he sipped his drink.

"oh god, no don't make that mistake." he said as he laid his hand on the table. "i trust you when you say you'll be there for her." he assured damon but he looked at him dead serious in the eye. "but never, ever, ever tell her she can have anything she wants." he said, a grin cracking onto his face. "unless you hate having money in the bank." he might have been joking again but there was some truth to it. he knew that he'd move heaven and earth for lexi but he could only imagine what their bank accounts would look like if they'd promised each other whatever they wanted.

there had to be something in the air. that was the only way he could describe it. he and lexi had been working on things back home but the progress had been slow, painfully so as they'd worked with each other to get back into some sort of rhythm but it had seemed near impossible. but the second they'd landed, taken a breath of air that wasn't tense or cold, it seemed they'd both relaxed a little. maybe it was the atmosphere, the different place or the fact they both no longer felt the weight of reconciliation on their shoulders. maybe it was just what they'd needed. he smiled as he watched lexi play with rory in the water, the delighted giggles coming from his daughter warming his heart almost as much as the smile on her face did.

he made sure to keep an eye on the boys as he leaned his hands back, moving his legs in the water as the sun beat down on their small family. it seemed like no time has passed at all before he heard the unmistakable sound of rory starting to grizzle. he sat upright and brushed his hands against his legs and chuckled a little when he saw her grumpy face, almost as if the water she'd been loving a moment ago was now the most offending thing she'd ever seen in her life. he stretched out to reach for the towels he'd brought out for the kids and he drew one close so he could wrap it around her when she was passed out to him.

taking her carefully into his arms, making sure she didn't slip, he lifted her out of the pool and quickly wrapped the towel around her so she didn't feel chilled. "is that better?" he asked her softly as he felt her snuggle against his chest and her little mouth formed an O as she yawned. he rested his cheek against her hair and glanced down at the boys when lexi did and he had to agree, they were both tired and it was only a matter of time before they started snipping at each other as a way to cope. "i think that sounds perfect." he said, though he found himself distracted for a moment watching his wife get out of the pool. the way the water glistened on her body. it still surprised him to this day just how much he loved her. that even when they were at their absolute worst, the feeling was so strong he could never ignore it or walk away from it. he tore his eyes away from her, more than a little disappointed, and he looked across at the boys and waved his hand to them. "come on you two, out you get and dry off. then we'll have a bath, we'll find a snack and you can have a nice long nap." he said as he rocked his body softly to keep rory settled and calm.

everyone wanted a passionate relationship until that passion was no longer exclusive to the bedroom. he and lexi had never had a problem wanting each other, they loved each other totally and so much so that it hurt james to think about how much he loved his wife. but that came with emotions that weren't just about love. james was sure that it was a major part of the problems they were going through right now. they'd always fought, they were loud and they were stubborn and they were passionate about their lives so they'd had some ripper fights over their marriage and he was sure they'd have many more over the years. but this? this wasn't an argument, it wasn't a fight, it had been an accumulation of lots of things and it had been enough to shatter that desire for each other. it wasn't gone, he didn't think it would ever be gone but it had felt different to him, like he couldn't put the pieces together and he couldn't make sense of what he was feeling. there had been fragments snapping back into place for the last week or two, being helped by effort being made and steps being taken and leaps done by both of them to try and connect with each other but with her in his arms now, it was like they were flying back together with a speed that was unmatched.

if he hadn't needed to go check on the kids he'd have stayed there with her forever. he'd have pulled her down onto the bed in the room and just hold her until time stopped. he'd missed the feeling of her being in his arms and now she'd been in them and she was gone again, they ached. his chest ached because she wasn't against his chest and there was something missing from his very being as he walked away from her. it was a feeling he'd missed. he'd missed not wanting to be apart from her, missed being drawn to her like a magnet and the connection that fate seemed to not want to let either of them lose. there seemed to be some great works and plans behind the lives they were creating together. everything from the start should have told them they wouldn't work. different countries, being so young, suffering a loss so tragically like they did and it hadn't blown them apart, it had drawn them together and now they had their three beautiful children. james couldn't wait to see how they'd grow up to change the world because they were meant to be a part of it.

once again she slipped from his hold as she lowered herself into the water but this time it felt a little different. she was still there, she was next to him and it felt so right. nothing was fixed but for the first time he had real hope that what they'd had before hadn't gone anywhere, it was there and waiting for them to wake up and take it back. he leaned forward a little to pass rory over to the waiting and sage arms of her mother and once she was in them he leaned back on his hands, moving his feet in the water slightly as he watched his girls in the pool, the way rory's hands gripped onto lexi and the way he feet kicked in the water, the giggling louder than it had been, obviously very happy where she was right now, safe in her mother's arms and surrounded by water. he looked across to where jare and tae were still diving down to get treasure that didn't exist and he was awed by their imagination. the fact that his kids had that, it meant everything to him. they could have that fun, they could play pretend because it was fun and because they were kids. they didn't need to play pretend to escape.

he was glad when both boys seemed to get changed without too much of a fuss. he knew jare was exhausted and he could relate so he wouldn't hold it against him. tae on the other hand was a little harder to distract and get to cooperate but eventually he'd pulled a giggle out of the boy and he'd gotten ready just like his brother. he hoped that once they got into the pool they'd relax, then they could shower off, have something to eat and get all three kids into their beds without too much of a fuss tonight. then hopefully they'd be up at their usual time in the morning and then the day could go as planned. of course the odds were their plans would go out the window, one of the kids would sleep in for hours, the other would be up extra early and the last one would wake up in between and the crankiest of all. if that happened though, he was sure they could all handle a day on the couch watching movies and stuffing themselves with gelato or pasta.

he almost felt lexi jolt when he touched her back and to be honest he hadn't even been planning on it, it had just been a subconscious move he'd made but it felt like is sparked something in his finger tips and he let his hand linger there. it had been so long since they'd touched each other, really touched each other like they used to. they were an affectionate couple, all over each other and not afraid to show each other how much they loved each other and then this whole thing had happened and it had broken something between them, there was no longer casual touches between them, there was hardly any deliberate touching either and there had been few times where they'd been more than intimate in the last few months. but the feeling in his fingers spread further into his body and he couldn't hide the fact it felt amazing enough he let his fingers linger against her back for as long as he could.

he smiled a little as lexi suggested the boys head down to the pool ahead of them. both boys were water smart, they'd been around and in water since they'd been old enough to go into the pool and they knew not to get too close and what to do if they did fall in. they lived near the beach, had troughs and watering holes on the property and creeks and rivers close to them. water safety had been so important when they'd been little. his smile softened as tae took jare's hand and followed him out of the room without too much of a fuss. he did an internal fist pump at the small step their youngest son had just taken to leave the room without them and he let out a breath. "i need to change too." he said with a small smile as he walked through to the main bedroom with her.

he moved to his case and took in the room they were staying in. he'd been in it before but this time it felt slightly different. the last time he'd been in here he couldn't wait to throw lexi down on the bed and enjoy it with her in a totally different way but this time .. the desire to be close to her was there but he wasn't sure about throwing her down on the bed, well gently throwing. he stooped down to open his own case and he pulled out his swim shorts and he quickly changed out of them and tossed his plane clothes towards the bathroom door, something he did at home too that he was sure annoyed his wife but it was a habit he hadn't managed to break yet. "i'll go get rory." he said as he glanced at her while she changed into the bikini. he hesitated for a second and he paused to press a kiss to her cheek quickly before he walked out of the room. it was the small things right? that's what it was going to take. small steps to build up the courage to take the bigger steps. that's what he was hoping anyway.

he headed down the stairs to where they'd left rory sitting peacefully in her carrier still, just looking around the room she was in now she'd woken up and he touched her cheeks gently. "look at you. such a quiet kid." he said as he undid her from her restraints and he pulled her to his chest, cradling her close as he picked up the carrier and he took it outside with them. he didn't want to leave her in it but he wanted it with them in case both him and lexi wanted to get into the pool, they could put her back into there so she was safe by the water. he grinned wide when he saw his two boys and he set the carried down and then he looked at them. "okay! in you jump!" he said with as huge a smile as he could muster and he saw down on the edge of the pool, pulling rory's shoes off and tossing them next to the carrier so she could splash her feet in the water if she wanted while she was sitting on his lap.