Welcome to Hickstead, home to both Seven Oak Stables, and Blue Acre - two rival stables. Both offer opportunities for their clients to reach the highest level of excellence. Each stable differs from the other, so choose wisely and never forget, loyalty is everything... Meanwhile as the stables battle it out, there's trouble brewing at the university. Be careful, if you don't pick a side you may get caught in the cross-fire...
This is an chilled out rpg with a super friendly and relaxed atmosphere! Remember to sign up with your characters full name in all caps and don't forget to do your claims! Thank you and Welcome, we've been established since 10th March 2009 but unfortunately have had to close guest view of our boards due to multiple sites ripping off our hard work, such a shame! Come chat to us in Discord before joining if you like!.
17TH AUGUST 2006, So Lily got me this lame journal for my birthday yesterday - well our birthday seeing as the whole 'triplet' thing means i share it with her and lil' logan. I figure i may as well use it right? I'd feel bad if i didn't, she seemed genuine about it helping with .. organising your thoughts or whatever. She's far too organised, she need's to loosen up. But anyway, that's not really a very interesting subject is it. I guess i should tell you about myself, isn't that what people do in journals? Or should i get right down and dirty in my life's story? yeeeeeeah right. Down and dirty it is..
Sucks that the summer hols are almost over, going back to school this september hardly sounds appealing at all. Year eleven's going to be interesting though - GCSE's and all. I don't really care about them, i'll wing it .. i always do. Lily'll probably moan at me though so i guess i'll get roped into a bit of revision some time or later. Logan's not looking forward to going back either.. i havn't seen him around much. He's been hanging out with Luke a lot. Swear those kids are attached at the hip, and as much as that lucas kid irritates the crap outta me, i'm glad Logan has someone else to look out for him. I can't keep an eye out for him all the time; Lil's needs me too. She likes to think she can take care of herself, but she has no idea... she doesn't know the extent of what someone could do to her.. someone like dad.
Still at least going back to school means we'll get away from the folk's more. Sure, since mum came back last year things settled, but they're starting to stir again. The night before last was a bit... well it all started off fine. We were having dinner - me, Lily, mum and dad..and Logan was late. Mum poured some wine for dinner... she thought dad could handle it seeing as it had been months since his last drink... but it didn't take long for him to down the bottle, and then he started to get mad that Logan didn't show up. Mum was trying to sedate him, saying he was at Luke's, but dad got worse and mum did too - she doesn't really care about us, i doubt she ever really wanted us...
So when they started really yelling i just grabbed Lily and took her upstairs. She doesn't need to hear it, the yelling, and they were sure to start smashing china. So i made her go upstairs. She pretends she's okay but she's not.. i can see the fear in her eyes. I waited at the top of the stairs for Logan to come back, i didn't want him to get involved, and he turned up eventually. Dad stumbled down the hall to try and get to him but i got in the way and managed to shove him up the stairs and lock them both in my room - it's the only room in the house with a lock... i installed it last year in secret .. and luckily dad left us alone and slept it all off. Least things seemed to go alright yesterday. We all sat down for tea, and got a few things from them. But it wasn't very interesting a day.
Better quit while i'm ahead i suppose. I told a few mates that i'd play baseball tomorrow with them in the park and it's getting late. Hopefully those girls from the other day will be there again, they seemed rather impressed with me last time... maybe i can impress them again....
19TH AUGUST 2006, excellent day! woke up to a weirdly scorching summer day! yeah i know, heat in england - rather a miracle. the others were already up, and mum and dad were out somewhere, i'd say work but i can't remember if they've been sacked from these one's yet or not. but that aside, it was boiling so, i decided to wake logan up by throwing water in his face. dude's normally well up before me, summer hols or not summer hols - i'm the one who sleeps til midday, he's the idiot up at the crack of dawn. but for whatever reason he was still asleep so.. i decided to give him an early morning shower. i would have paid to have a picture of his face right then.
well of course it turned into a fully fledged water fight! logan was originally aiming for me, but he got lily in the face with a water bomb so of course she came after us - and i managed to snag her for my team. she's got one heck of a good shot for a girl, and hell logan called up luke so it was two on two. we tried hard to keep it out of the house but then again i wasn't that bothered; i figured, if we got in shit for it then we got in shit for it, i'd take the wraith of the idiot if i had to.
needless to say i totally won the water fight, even if lily did betray me and join luke and logan's naff team. i don't know what they managed to say to persuade her to change teams, she was adamant on kicking their ass. she dissapears for five minutes while i pound logan with some water balloons, and comes back and squirts me with the hose! i've already set something up to get her back .. fifty water ballooons, all in her bed. she's always jumping onto it or whatever, and tonight when she does 'BAM' they're all gonna burst. that should be any minute now... oh wait, yep, that's her screaming aaaand cursing my name. revenge.. gotta love it. hopefully i'll live to see tomorrow.. i'm supposed to be going to see kalona. there's an end of summer show coming up that i think we'll be ready for...oh shit lily's banging on the door. she sounds piiiiissed...
20TH AUGUST 2006, well i did survive, even if kalona wqas a little on the wild side earlier. he gets like that sometimes - edgy, difficult to control and unfocused - but usually after working him for a little while, he'll calm down and relax. thing was yesteray he wouldn't, and i got this bad feeling that something was wrong. he even tried taking off in a bucking spree when i asked him to canter, but i managed to yank his head up which stopped him. it's made me re-think that show in two weeks, but i don't want to pull out now. he'll be fine, it was just one of those days...
apparently our cousins are coming over from dublin or whatever next week. i'm not really that bothered about it - i havn't seen them since god knows when, mum said it was something about their dad being a tight ass but i wasn't really listening. the annoying thing is there's going to be a lot of room switching and the worse thing is i have to share my room with logan and the two guys - chris and james. i don't care about sharing with logan, but i don't know these dudes. they'd better not be annoying or snore. oh god if they snore i'm going to hit them on the head with a blunt object i swear. i like my sleep.
logan said he was just going to go off to luke's for a week - but mum and dad wouldn't let him. they were .. very clear on that. particulary dad. i had to drag logan out the room before the shouting became a fist fight. i might know how to throw a punch but logan doesn't, he'll just take it. i wonder what the cousin's will be like. i know there's ashley too, and she's rooming with lily - logan's room is going to be for the aunt and uncle i think. but at the very least, i'm so going to pull some pranks on the three of them...
24TH AUGUST 2006, so perhaps you're wondering why i havn't written in here for a few days. the answer is .. quite long and complicated but i guess i can take the time to explain it to you seeing as i'm GROUNDED and so i have nothing but time right now. okay well three days ago i met this girl. well i'd seen her around in school before, and hell i've eyed her up - who hasn't - but i've never really tried talking to her. i don't fancy it in front of those vultures she calls her friends that cling to her like frickin' leaches at all times. seriously why do girls always hang out in gangs!? anyway going off topic..
..so anyway i was walking into town to grab coffee, and well .. okay i admit i was skiving off my last lesson alright?! i do it every so often but come on, who needs a pass grade in P.S.E?! and i kind of bumped into her and well.. we got talking and she invited me to her party she was having the next day - which was two days ago see. so i said sure, and that i'd try and drag logan with me. that boy needs to get out more and meet some girls, it's obvious why he's so quiet and cranky half the time.
so the next night i knew my parents would never let me go, but hell this isn't the first time i've gone out without their permission, so i got ready and all then climbed out the window and down the tree in the front garden. it's not too hard - one of the thickest branches hangs right by the window and i've done it that way before. logan refused to come, even after i said i was going to put salt in his tea from now on if he didn't. his loss. drunk hot girls and alcohol.. what more could you want? i may be fifteen but i'm still a guy.
well anyway, i made it to her house easy, and i think i had a good time. i did drink rather a lot so the events are a bit on the hazy side, plus i don't want to give away too much but hell... i did more than talk to stacy Paunter that night... she was one gracious host... but yeah, and then i think i staggered home about 3..4am? i don't remember. but obviously, bein that drunk i wasn't too smart on the whole sneaking in thing. i tried climbing up the tree and well.. okay i failed i'll admit. and the noise got mum and dad up - and they were..furious. very very furious.
things got out of hand very quickly. dad was yelling at me about being irresponsible and stupid and he grabbed me. i was drunk and stupid and rather than being able to do what i'd usually do and protect the others and get out of these things. but instead i just kept being smart mouthed..and then.. he started hitting me. it was worse than usual because i was so .. out of it i couldn't defend myself and i couldn't hit back. the drink was starting to wear off a bit and i was getting angry too .. and mum was yelling and dad was trying to drag me inside.. and then lily and logan ran out. oh god lily ... she tried to stop dad. i've told her time and time again never to get in the way! and dad.. he wasn't thinking...thats what i tell myself. he wouldn't really hurt her like that otherwise surely... he let go of me for a second and backhanded her so hard she went flying into the wall of the house..
..it was...it was horrible. and stll the worse thing was i couldn't quite work things out in my head or move how i wanted..the alcohol had truly screwed with my head. i saw logan go to grab her and pick her up .. i think she lost conciousness. and then i remember yelling at him to take her away.. and logan ran for luke's. he used to do that once him and luke became close and luke knew the truth.. well most of the truth.. about our family. i ran after him, i knew if i'd stayed i'd just have been made dad's punching bag for the rest of the morning.
so yeah... we fled to luke's and by the time i got there logan had already set lily down in luke's room and she was coming round. i don't remember after that. i just about got to his room before i slid down the wall and lost concious myself. the drink did it mostly, but i couldn't feel how bad the beating had been then so i dunno..could've been that too? anyway... i woke up roughly around midday. i hate hangovers. with a passion. i made sure lily was okay .. luke didn't seem very happy at all... i think he blamed me but the thing is, he was right to. it was my fault.
i went home shortly after i woke up. i knew i had to face the music, it'd be bad enough. they didn't want me to go alone but i didn't want lily or logan to get hurt if dad flipped again so i went back by myself. dad was out, but mum took one pissed off look at me and told me i was grounded, and that if i ever did that again i'd get worse than just dad's fists. i pretty much ignored her, i don't hold her in high respect since she left us all those years ago, and pretty much holed myself up in my room wishing i could kind of forget what happened... but i can't, and lily getting hurt was my fault. which just proves how bad a big brother i am.
but yeah, that was yesterday - the coming back. i pretty much stayed in my room since then, i wanted to sneak out to see kalona but i havn't dared in case i got caught again... logan and lily came back some time last night and immediatly went to their rooms too after checking on me - probably to see if i was alive - and then it's been quiet since. mum and dad have left me be, and since i didn't go down for breakfast or dinner lily and logan snuck some up. i don't really want to see my parents right now. i'm too ... disgusted with them. especially with the way dad just..hit lily like that..and he didn't even care..the fact that they try to act parental as if they think they have a right. they don't, and one day i'm going to give them what's coming to them...
28TH AUGUST 2006, Well these past four days have been surprisingly - or unsurprisingly - eventful. Even it I have been grounded where supposedly I'm meant to stay in my room I manage to get out yesterday to see kalona. I could teach inmates a thing or two about escaping! I thought about going to a mates party but I decided against it after last time. I like to party and all and I can usually get away with it pretty easily but what happened the other night has shaken me. Sure I don't care to admit it to someone else but to this journal thing I guess I can. I'm always afraid. Under the jokes, the bravado I'm terrified that something I'll do will get one o my siblings killed. I just want to escape and it's the only way I know how - Logan has Luke, lily has a horse she shares with a friend or work and so why can't I have something without bein do scared? Maybe I should learn to lighten up, besides I take my phone everywhere with me and if lily or Logan needed me then I'd be there. No matter what.
Still I'm being gloomy, so unlike me. Kalona was pretty good the other day and I'm really looking forward to this show. I heard that its actually a qualifier for a hickstead class! Not the major derby but still it's a pretty big deal.. If we can qualify for it. I really hope so. I'm goin to get practising more as soon as I can get out of this stupid grounded thing. It's not like they really enforce it, they'll just smack or scream whenever they fancy it, they don't get the concept of grounding a kid. Besides they think it'll keep me in? Give over. Luckily mum and dad have been busy getting ready for the cousins, who actually got here today but I'll get to that in a moment. Oh I had great fun winding the rents up! Whenever mum put something down I'd sneak in and move it. It was driving her nuts but she deserved it. Course she blamed dad who just lazed about all day which was even more of a bonus. Still me, lily and Logan have pretty muh kept out of the way aside from my little mind game with mum yesterday. It's even been quite nice - the peace.
Right so. The cousins. Well they arrived this afternoon and though I've already had a tussle with Chris they're pretty cool. He tried to grab this journal when he came to put his stuff in my room and we had a bit of a scuffle but that aside he's pretty cool. He was talking pranks with me earlier and we've got a couple planned out actually. James seems alright but he's a bit quieter actually. Made me wonder if he's a bit like Logan. But actually he's lightens up quite a bit, and I think they're going to be a good laugh. Our dads seem to be the same though. Assholes. Which kinda make me feel for then and all, means we have at least one thing in common right? Still I haven't had much of a chance to get to know them yet but they seem alright. Haven't seen muh I Ashley - lily and her hugged said something about shopping and dissappeared to her room since. Probably talking about girl things like fashion or boys. Urgh girl talk.
I decided I'd take James and Chris to meet kalona tomorrow, they like horses apparently. Lily and Ashley can come if they want, I'm not fussed. At some point we'll have to show them the town and all, and I plan on getting them invited to a party before they go.. A bit of fun before they leave. I wouldn't be Leo if I didn't!
Dinner time, I'll update on events later tomorrow or something, we shall see ... I don't want them to catch me writing in here or they'll snag it and read it. Peace out!
30TH AUGUST 2006, Well yesterday was one heck of a day I'll tell you that much. I would have written in here yesterday but when we got back from this party I doubt I could've put pen to paper and written one coherent line. Nobody wants to read drunken words - not that anyone's ever going to read this anyway. 'Cept maybe an older me. Heh I wonder what I'll be like when I'm older and where I'll be. Hopefully the same old me, but some place nicer, far away from here I'd like to think? Who knows. I'm not really much of a planner. Lily's the organiser, I just go along with what's happening at the time, then Logan drags his feet with the 'but what if's'.
Anyway right so, yesterday..I'll start from yesterday. Bit of a tense morning to be honest. Got up for breakfast at around eleven and couldn't resist waking James up with a cup of cold water...over his face. He didn't seem too amused himself but I found it funny so who cares? The look on his face..priceless. He said he'd get me back but we'll see - I'm the comedy genius in this family, people come second best to any of my pranks but I'll have to wait and see if this kid surprises me. Chris gave me a congratulatory pat on the back for it so I think we're officially mates now or whatever. Not like you need a certificate to announce it. But right breakfast was tense. I'll get to that part. Well when we headed downstairs something was already up. The girl's were at the table were some left overs of breakfast was still served but both were really quiet, and the adults were all glaring at each other over the table top.
We ignored them and sat down, started helping ourselves and the next thing I know, dad's sending a plate of bacon crashing as he lunges across the table for Uncle whats-his-name's throat. A fight ensured and I just grabbed some food, scoffed it down then try to herd the rest of the lot out before someone got hurt. But James wouldn't budge, he said that we had to stop them or something so the idiot went rushing past me, trying to grab his dad and haul him back. I knew it wouldn't work so I tried to grab James when suddenly his dad's elbowing him hard in the face and sending us both sprawling. I could have told him it was going to happen but stupid kid wasn't listening. I just hauled him to his feet and pretty much had to headlock him and drag him down the hall way till I could shove him out the front door to join the others.
He didn't seem too pleased with the rough handling but I'm not gonna pussy-foot around at times like that. It kinda pissed me off. Yeah sure maybe he's not seen his dad like that or something, but I know what they're like. You have one abusive parent you know them all. The punches might do each other good, give them something to hurt over rather than them hurting others for a chance, so James trying to stop it pissed me off a little and yeah, I cold-shouldered him a little. Lily of course was all concerned about the bruise forming on his face but once I'd strode off toward the stables the rest followed shortly after. I showed them kalona and it was pretty good, we all relaxed a little and I let James and Chris try out Kalona with interesting results. They're not bad riders, but both of them struggled with the horse. Kalona's a very difficult ride, and a lot of being able to handle him is based on him trusting you so I knew why the struggled and they did pretty well anyway. But it was a release to get on him myself after and really make him focus and work. They all dipped into their inner course-building selves and made up a course for me to practise. Chris and James were really tough and whacked up this dog-leg treble with horribly tight striding right off the corner which was tricky but I love a challenge.
After that we mooched about in town for a bit, hung out in Starbucks, got to know each other a bit. Eh I'm not usually one for all that talk, it doesn't really bother me where they came from or what school they went to. I like anecdotes though and they had a few funny stories but generally it was kinda nice to chill out for a few hours. I spoke to one of my good friends Matt who was throwing a party that night and got the OK to bring the cousins with me, but then Lily and Ash started protesting saying they wanted to come, even when I said no because I knew what type of party it was and I didn't want them in that. Of course Lily's not an idiot, so she brought out this whole threat that if I didn't let them go she'd tell dad it was me that switched the sugar for salt last week...so I said she could go and then on the way back we ran into Logan and Luke and suddenly they were invited so we all went!
We snuck out in the end. Leo style! Yep, I taught them my way of getting out. Seemed the cousin's had all done it once or twice before which sent them up in my respect levels, and I know Lily had...Logan was surprisingly knowledgable though I didn't think he'd ever snuck out without me before but eh. Not that it matters. Still, we climbed out the window and down the Silver Birch easily enough and then we were off! I wish I could remember more of what happened but I'm afraid I can't quite. We got there sometime around tenish I think, then Logan and Luke disapeared somewhere, probably to find some people who might be as socially awkward as they were. Lily dragged Ash off to meet some of her friends so I started introducing James and Chris to the lads at school and all. The drinking started and things get fuzzier. I remember this girl kept catching my eye and the guys were making jokes, but she was hot so I told them to watch me work and before long I was charming her into my arms. Girls can be so easy sometimes. Chris got chatting to some guys from our rugby team that I'm in and seemed happy to talk to them so I left him to it, I tried to set James up with someone..the girl.. her name was..melody I think? With one of her friend's but he looked uncomfortable so I gave up and left him to his own devices. No idea if he got with her or not, I'll ask him later I guess, cause at that time Melody or Melanie was tugging me to the stairs so .. my thoughts went one track after that.
Still weirdest thing ever. When we were heading up the stairs I could have sworn I saw Lily snogging the face off Luke. No joke, I swear they were kissing, with her arms round his neck, his arms around her waist. Cause I stopped as soon as I passed them and turned back, about to grab Luke by the throat and toss him all the way down the stairs and outside, but when I turned back they were just talking..barely touching, if only a little so people could squeeze past. I guess I must have been seeing things, or mistaken them for the couple two steps down who were locking lips. Either way I still can't help but get the feeling it wasn't an alcohol haze, but seeing as after that I was being lead into a spare room (tossing out some couple who'd tried to claim the room first) I forgot all about it until now.
I have little idea about how we made it home. Vauge recollection of someone coming into the room sometime later shouting my name. Chris I think? Completely drunk, laughing and saying he was sorry for interrupting but we had to go. So managed to stagger out... I think he must have got the others together because they were all outside. One of them asked where my shirt was and it was only after that I realised I'd left it behind. I still need to get it back - it's one of my favourites. Then the next thing I remember is slumping into my bed. Oh yeah not before drunkenly drawing a moustache and beard in permanent pen on Logan's face. Kid was spark out. Chris added some whiskers and we were gonna get James too but he seemed too restless and we didn't want him to wake up and catch us.
Logan woke me up earlier with water to the face. My head is killing me and I was not amused I can tell you. You do not. wake. me. up. ever. But I'm over it now, and he thinks he's had his revenge for the drawing on his face thing but I'd have done worse if it was the other way around. Still...Oh I think James is waking up.. Oh man he seems pissed, Chris totally got him! He made James put one of Lily's dresses on!? I seriously don't remember that but that is class... and shit he's stumbling across the room to kill us. Uh oh! LATER!
31st AUGUST 2006, Boring day. Okay well not completely boring but it could have been more exciting I suppose. The plan was to head into town for a game of laser quest. Being in the middle of london makes it pretty easy to find places to go when you had nothing to do. The thing was when we got up it was pouring with rain, and Ashley was complaining about walking through the rain to the town, and Chris and James didn't want to leave her behind, so Lily was all diplomatic and suggested we stayed here. Joys. Not that the day was that dull really but I really fancied some laser quest.
I'm a pretty active guy and I like getting out there and running about and shooting stuff, rain or no rain. I felt the others were being a bit of a spoilsport. That plus the fact I had our house. It always feels so enclosed, like a cage, shutting me in. It's why I try to escape all the time. But I guess it was lucky that the 'rents went out. I think they went out to show uncle and aunt some landmarks or something. Good luck to them. So Lily hunted out some board games with mine and Logan's help ( the attic's a little too creepy for her ). Yeah, we resorted to board games and.. okay fine I admit it was FUN!
We played game of life, until we started to get too bored with playing by the book and soon we were all cheating and trying to sneakily get ahead of the game. Logan refused and kept playing by the book, claiming that being the only really moral one wasn't fair so he called up Luke, and the boy turned up with uno for the hell of it. So we gave up and played Uno for a bit. That was pretty good. Ashley was damn good at that game and had us all beat several times no matter how competitive me and James got. Seems me and him are quite similar in the respect that we like to win, and when I lost for the third time in a row I couldn't help throwing a grape at Luke which I'm proud to say I hit right between the eyes. He rolled his eyes rather than get me back, because he knows I was asking for it a little and wouldn't have backed down, and he didn't want to start something.
I dunno quite why he bugs me so much but there's something about him I don't like. It's like... I don't know I just don't like him, there's something I can't put my finger on when it comes to him. It's not like he's a bad kid, he keeps his head down in school, keeps his nose clean, mixes with the right friends, has a decent family and looks out for Logan and even Lily. But I don't know I have a feeling he's always going to be a guy who rubs me the wrong way, someone I'll always butt heads with, someone who's got more of a part of play in the future. I don't know. But anyway we don't really get along that well but sometimes we do, sometimes I don't even have to try. He's alright really. I suppose.
But yeah a few fun games until the 'rents came back then we dispersed. Don't like hanging around them for too long. In the end we all headed up to my room and played this game called 'Dirty Minds'. Funniest thing ever, kinda wrong when you hear your siblings saying things that sound incredibly rude but still hilarious. We wasted the rest of the evening playing it and then because we're all big kids at heart and couldn't be bothered to head to our own rooms...well, Lily and Ashley couldn't be bothered to head down the hall, and Luke had already been detirmined to stay over, so like bosses, we made a sort of fort? Yes childish maybe but was so funny.
It happened because Lily had to say something really embarrassing, so she tried to hide under James' duvet when we started teasing her about it, and we were joking about how she couldn't stay under there. Then she said she could and she tried to make it like a tent..the next thing I know we're all making a fort, and then throwing things over the top at each other having split into two sides. After a while we chilled out. It was surprisingly not too stuffy with so many of us in the room, and it'd been a while since we'd done anything like this - ever in fact with the cousins. Being the same age, from time to time me, Logan and Lily would share a room, just if we felt like we needed the closeness of our siblings or if we wanted to mess around till late or something like play games. But it was quite fun. The rest of them are asleep now so I decided to write in here. It's actually going to be a shame when the cousin's leave in a few days, they've been decent fun but hopefully we'll meet them again soon. Still, few more days yet. Anyway time to sleep. Oh god if whoever's snoring doesn't shut up I will be hitting them.
so leo has a diary now does he? cant say i'm surprised . . though if i'd of had to pick one of them for keeping a diary, i'd have picked logan. leo doesn't strike me as the type. but then again, it's usually the ones you don't think. reading through this thing has been entertaining as all hell, thought it makes me see our lives arent so different, guess we really are related. though, since i've got nothing to do . . and everyone else is down at the barn. apparently being beaten means i cant go out and have fun. though to be honest, lily kinda scares me, so i wasn't gonna argue with her. leo thinks he can scare people, but he really cant. it's easy to see through him, he pretends to be all tough, but he's really not.
leo was worried about us snoring? . . man i think there's earthquakes in australia every time he falls asleep. it's so loud, throwing stuff at him works most of the time though. have to admit, i didnt really wanna come here either, it's not like we knew these guys well, but their not so bad, the live like we do really, hiding, taking crap we shouldn't have to take. but they seem like they'll survive it. though ash is going quiet, which is kinda scary. but hey, not like i'm her keeper or anything.
snag it and read it? more like snag it and decide o write. i have no idea whats possessing me to do this, might have to try this diary thing out for myself, it's not half bad once you actually try it. (leo you tell anyone that and i swear i'll murder you) your right about our dad's being the same though. but we live in a place thats easier to escape in, on the nights dad's too drunk we steal his tent and pitch it in the woods. he's too drunk to try and attempt to cross the creek so we usually get away with it. you guys should buy a tent, their good for hiding out, and camping places are free. just a thought if you ever need to escape, some advice. i could have used some years back.
turns out our dad's really hate each other. we cant for the life of us work out why we came here then. guess their mom and my mom thought the family should be together. dunno why, it's not like they do anything really, cept fight. though i have noticed one thing, the more i think about it, i look nothing like my dad, honestly, i look more like leo and lily's dad to be honest, which i guess, we're family right? . . still . . it's odd. really odd. to me anyway. that party, is never being mentioned again, it was the worst thing ever, and the morning after, was awful. waking up in a dress, being beaten to a pulp, and having to listen to luke and leo have a pissing contest was just too much, my advice to you leo, ignore him!
oh and ust one last thing, before we never mention that party again. YES! lily and luke were snogging in the hallway. YES! it was luke who gave lily the hickey, though it's not all he gave her i'm sure. they need to check to make sure everyone in the room is actually asleep.
crud . . hear them coming, where did i find this thing again? . . oh right . . i know
james
TWENTY FIVE | RACING INSTRUCTOR/PERSONAL TRAINER | LEXI SAFFI WHITE JARED WHITE | 6 TAITE WHITE | 4 RORY WHITE | 2
1st September 2006, I cannot believe he did that. He stole my journal and wrote in it?! DICK! You don't do that! He clearly read it too there's no doubt about that. Wow I feel violated. I thought if anyone was likely to hunt this out and read it it would have been Chris; and then he'd have probably copied out sentences or memorised them and come out with them at awkward moments to embarrass me, but James? I thought he was the responsible one - the Logan like one. My opinion's changed of him fast I can say. Yeah I'm not happy he did that to my journal but I guess there's a grudging appreciation he didn't ruin it or read it to everyone else or anything, actually I'm surprised he actually wrote an entry himself. If anything I'd have though he might have just done a 'James woz here' thing but eh.
So what if I'm the one who writes the journal in this family? I'm sure Logan does, and Lily probably does too seeing as she gave me this one in the first place. It's not like I gush about my feelings or anything. I'm not some sap. Glad he found it so entertaining, not that the purpose of it was comedy but eh I guess it's better than being pathetic right? Least if he ever taunts me for this I can say that he wants to do one now too so.. whatever. I like how he finds Lily scary. She's not she's just kinda...motherly I guess, more so than our mum is to us. She tries to keep us in line a little, stop us from doing anything too stupid. But she was right, after James getting beaten up yesterday morning by his dad it wasn't a good idea for him to do anything but rest.
What does he mean 'pretends to be tough'?! I AM tough! Tougher than him! Didn't he see the way I saved his ass yesterday? Okay so my knuckles are a bit sore now - hitting flesh and bone of a man is painful but still. I'm not a pussy or anything, geez. And I do NOT snore!!! That's such a lie! I would know if I did, plus I would feel them throw things at me. I always sleep with...books and pillows and crumpled pieces of paper around my head! Huh weird that he was the same as us...or at least, me. Logan didn't say much about whether he wanted to meet them, Lily was already talking about making them feel welcome. I didn't really want them here but oh congrats to us he thinks we're alright. Seems sucky that they get what we go through, that they get the same crap. People shouldn't have to live like this, not young people anyway. He's worried about Ash...maybe I should talk to him about it? I'm the same with Logan. He used to be quite lively as a kid till dad started throwing punches. Not that there's anything wrong with being quiet but still, it's not quite right, and Ash is only fourteen...
I don't know what possessed James to do it either, and I swear I am going to have to tease him about this later. 'It's not half bad once you actually try it'. Weird though, I used to think it was girls stuff but I guess it's not really, it's just what you've been doing, what's on your mind sort of thing. Yeah I thought I was write about uncle. Lucky that the cousins seem to have some place to hide. Camping sounds like fun actually, maybe we could try it. Then again Luke's is usually easier. He's alright in a crisis I suppose, Logan and Lily get along with him well enough, and his parent's are helpful and don't question anything. We have our own way of dealing. That or I'll hide out at a friend's. Not like I don't have enough to choose from right! ha ha.
Never speak of the party again? Pft blasphemy! Who else am I going to brag to about my antics? I have no idea what he's talking about his looks for, why would I care? Me, Lily and Logan being triplets somehow got this, blonde hair green eyes thing going on, and we don't really look like our dad at all - mum a little but apparently the green eyes come from our grandpa. Sometimes it skips generations apparently, I don't know, I just got told it's a White family trait really, one day when our parent's weren't drunk and where being nice.
Wait he says ignore Luke? How the hell can I ignore that son of a bitch when he's pissing me off all the damn time?! I'll admit that yesterday morning wasn't fun, waking up with such an awful hangover, hearing Luke has his hands over my sister, then seeing James beaten up. Wait... wait wait wait wait .... what's this at the bottom? What did he write again? ... You've got to be kidding me. My sister....and Luke? My sister and that complete asshole WERE kissing yesterday!? He have her a LOVE BITE?! AND HE DID WHAT TO HER?!!?! I'm going to kill him. I am GOING to kill him. Lucas Cole is a dead, dead man. How dare he sleep with my sister. WITH US IN THE ROOM AS WELL! Oh he is DEAD.
2nd September 2006, So I didn't kill him. In fact I'm writing this from said asshole's house. We had to go to his for the night, so I snuck back when they were watching a movie to grab some things and leave a note, didn't trust the rest of them to come to. Oh and I grabbed Ash and Chris too. They'd been dragged out with their parent's for the day, James got to stay because of his injuries, and the rest of us had the luck to be able to refuse. Our parent's are showing them the town apparently or some shit like that. I'm just glad I didn't have to go.
But yeah, so I'll start from yesterday after I said I'd kill Luke right? I woke him up by grabbing him and shaking him pretty hard, shouting about him touching my sister. He denied it at first until I told him James had told me, and he said 'it was only one time a while ago'. That really pissed me off. So what that this time they didn't do .. it or whatever. He admitted to giving her the love bite, and to him and her having done it before?! It sickened me, I'm not going to lie. Lily's only sixteen, heck she only turned sixteen last week so unless they got together last week she was fifteen at the time? Sure I've never liked the guy but I always thought at the least that he had respect for my family. To hear he's been using my sister?! No I'm not happy about it.
I don't care if it was her choice or whatever, she's too young to know what she's getting herself into. They're not even together for crying out loud and they're... sleeping together and making out! I mean, yeah maybe I'd give them some slack if they were actually together because I mean... couples can do whatever they want right? It means something. But if he keeps using her for his kicks, then I'm not going to be happy. Yeah I guess I did just give them permission I guess, to get together but to be fair, if they're going to be doing shit I'd rather they were proper and actually together rather than just him using her. If they like each other enough to do stuff then they should bother to get together.
I don't even know why I'm saying that. Lily could do a lot better, not going to lie. But I dunno, guess he has looked out for her and Logan recently so he can't be all that awful... I just don't want her getting hurt. I know what one night stands are like, I know what friends with benefits is like and neither of them benefit the girls at all. Guys, eh we're more versatile, if we don't like the girl enough to want to go further than it doesn't hurt us.. but girls.. it's different for girls. I just don't want Lily getting hurt. Maybe I should actually talk to them about this rather than just writing it. I mean, maybe they never made it official because I'm such an ass to Luke? I don't know. I just don't like the sneaking, and I don't want him to use her.
So after we had a bit of a tussle, James threw water on us to try and 'calm us down' and annoyed I headed downstairs. I was planning on getting him back with some water bombs you see, and so I went to throw them at him and he suddenly got really ill. It wasn't like I threw them hard, I don't know what it was. He got all pale and shit and then we helped him downstairs and he was sick. I made Logan go and get Lily and Luke because I didn't trust them upstairs alone, not right now, and damn it I really had to hold back from smashing him one. He doesn't get it sometimes. In the end nobody would listen to me about a hospital so Luke called his dad and we were all forced to go to his.
He stuck some cruddy movie on and James rested once he was seen to, and then I headed back to get some stuff and this, and Chris and Ash before coming back. Kinda weird to think that tonight's their last night here. I guess we'll go back home some time later. Didn't sleep that well but I'm planning something for later. I kinda want to send the cousin's off with a bang .. so last night when I should have been sleeping I was planning, and hopefully everything will go alright and all and they'll like it. I might go head to the gym later or ride or something. I need to calm down. I don't know why I'm so angry right now. With what happened to James and the whole Lily and Luke thing.. I don't know, but I need to cool it, I know that. Just difficult sometimes. It scares me, that I seem to have dad's temper at times, but I wouldn't hurt anyone I loved. No I wouldn't.
3rd September 2006, so, there have been some changes to the plans. chris and ashley are gone...but james isn't - in fact, he's transferring here, to stay here. i have no idea what really possessed him to do it; at least back where he is he could keep his brother and sister away from the violence in the woods. here, the only escape is luke's house, and that's always a danger...getting out, getting to luke's...keeping the trouble away from luke and the other's. still, i wake up this morning to get the prank ready to see some major discussion going on between the 'rents, aunt/uncle and james...and suddenly he's staying with them from now on. i don't mind, i quite like the guy really. it's only for a year or something like that, then i think he's going back for a bit, i don't really know...but i guess it's kinda cool. only thing is now i have one extra person to worry about when dad has his moments.
still things are looking up - the 'rents are out tonight, they're not back until tomorrow afternoon ...which means we get free run of the house! hell do we plan to make the most of it too! as soon as they're gone i plan on a fully fledged paintball fight. the other week i spent some money on a set of guns and gear...and paint balls. i've done it a couple of times and it's always fun so i figured why not buy my own set. i don't much care for the protection but it does hurt if you get hit with a paintball, and if i'm going to drag the girls into this epic battle then they'll need the pads. i figure we have a mass game, eat a load of junk, watch a good film, play video games, and then set things up for the grand finale - a house party. i've already got the booze and lily's sorting out food apparently. i've always been able to get served at the shop round the corner no problem... just flirt with the young woman who works there and it's easy to make her forget to ID you. she's pretty enough anyway.
hopefully the party will be a bomb, looking forward to it. i think i'm gonna head out and ride kalona now before it gets too late, and i'll be back tomorrow to explain everything...i have no doubt there'll be exciting stories to tell about this party... peace out.
6th September 2006, well...a lot happened in the end. it's been a few days because i've been in hospital since the 4th...i'll explain but only from the start. well being home alone was real fun, all of us got involved in a paint ball battle - me and james against lily, luke and logan... me and james were a strong team and logan's not that great a shot so we were pretty evenly matched. it was a great chance to shoot at luke for how much he'd pissed me off, and after we were actually getting on alright. had a good laugh after messing around with a bit of a food fight before we all ate junk for lunch...much to lily's attempts at protesting we at least be 'a little healthy'. we got a few games in on the xbox which i for the most part aced.. then it was time to get ready for the party.
we'd all invited a fair amount of people and word had gotten out so suddenly there was way more people than intended. still, good music, good booze, good foods..beautiful, sexy women. can't complain. i got way more than hammered and i think i made out with a few chicks but to be honest i barely remember their faces, all i know was they were good looking and decent kissers...and one of them had strawberry tasting lipgloss. still, time went on, things got broken... i vaugely remember lily and luke sneaking upstairs and if i'd been more sober i would've grabbed luke and throw him out the damn house for trying that. thing is when i'm drunk i seem to see everything a few seconds too late...
..apart from this guy who tried to punch me. the problem was, this group of complete twats showed up uninvited, and i asked them to leave because i didn't want them there. yeah, if i don't like something i'll damn well say it. well, one of them didn't like that and he tried to take a swing at me, so i ducked and smacked him right back. there was a fight and though he could a couple of punches in his technique was sloppy and weak and it wasn't hard to pound him out the door and get rid of him. that wasn't that weird, i can't help getting into a few fights here or there, i throw my weight around a lot. the weird part was.. when a couple of girls came over all fluttering eyelashes and 'ooo weren't you brave, i'll get you some ice'... this guy came over and started talking to me about this fight club thing. the real secret back alley kinda fight club, invitation only, completely illegal of course... people who know come to bet on who will win.. some people win decent money. the guy looked my age so i was a little shocked to hear about this when i figured it was more of an adult world kinda thing..still i shrugged and said no. i might like to blow off steam occasionally but not that much, and i was uncertain about the thing. he gave me his card anyway, said to come along to this warehouse if i changed my mind so i agreed and he dissapeared.
the rest gets a little fuzzy. next thing i'm waking up next to some blonde chick in my bed. she's hogging the covers and it's well into the morning...almost midday. hungover we had to do the big clean up. i wasn't in the best of moods with my head pounding and all, i'd drunk enough to get hungover, usually i didn't often feel too rough the next day. so when luke came out of lily's room that morning looking all smug i almost decked him. the only thing that stopped me was that .. grudgingly.. they did look kinda sweet the way they kinda...cuddled up together. apparently they're together now.. i still don't like him that much but i guess i kinda figure that if he's in it just to screw with her, he's a really good actor.. and a royal idiot. they generally looked kinda .. lovey ... all holding hands and teasing each other and crap. almost sickening actually.
anyway.. the big clean up happened.. and we all figured we should go to luke's to get out the way of when the 'rents came back. we headed to the stables for a little while to kill some time and see the horses and all, then luke suggested we go back to his again to eat. things were pretty chilled and all until lily suddenly flipped out ... out of nowhere. we were eating sandwiches in the kitchen and she suddenly went all pale and still, dropped her sandwich and clapped a hand to her mouth. i was gonna ask her what was wrong but she hurried out the room. i had gone to stand and follow but luke had been faster and i didn't feel like beating him out the way. anyway next thing i know they both come in, clutching one another looking sheepish and kinda scared.. i start thinking the worst... and then one of them.. i can't remember which...just comes out with the fact they didn't use any uh... 'protection' the night before, and it was too late for one of those morning pill things. i just remember there was a second of silence when all of us where just like 'what'? trying to figure it out..then i flung myself at luke,
too much maybe but i was furious. if he had knocked up my sister at sixteen i truly would slaughter him. it was bad enough when i found out he'd been touching her and all and now he was being irresponsible and screwing her life up? well we had a fight.. as per usual.. and in the end i walked. i was too angry to hang around. i think logan or lily.. or maybe james i'm not sure, called out to me but i kept walking. if it hadn't been my sister i would have said luke deserved something stupid like that to happen to him for being such a dick.. but it was lily.. a kid this young would mess up her entire future.. not to say dad would never allow it.. he'd either have her abort which lily wouldn't do, or he'd throw her out.. or kill her. i went home after a while, tired and wet from rain... not sure why i went back, maybe i shouldn't have. dad was tripping out about a small stain one of us had missed. long story short we argued, he learnt about the party and started making horrible threats about lily and logan and james and even luke and i snapped. third fight in two days... my body was going to ache the next day.. especially as dad's punches where better than the other two's. i didn't notice that at some point he'd flicked his fag from his mouth into the lounge, letting it land whereever... not until he shoved me and i flew backward into the wall did i notice the flames licking at the carpet.
and you know what? he shut the door and left me there. i'd hit my head so it took me a few moments to come too..when i did the whole room was up, and coughing like crazy i tried to get out. i don't know now if the door was locked or not but i nearly put my shoulder out trying to break it open. things start to go fuzzy from there.. i remember heat and coughing and pain as i got burnt and then the next thing..i'm waking up in here a couple of days later with burn wounds and a few worried siblings around the bed. i'm touched they cared enough to turn up...then of course when wouldn't they? james brought me my journal.. handing it to me when the others went for coffee so they didn't see. which was nice of him...so that's how i get to write in here. i get discharged tomorrow.. back home. apparently there's not too much damage. dad said the door got stuck.. that he tried to help me... but i doubt it. i think he wanted me to die.. just so he had one less 'problem' to pretend to care about. i already can't wait to get out of here.. i hate hospitals... even if the medication is good. i don't want to go home but there's not much else choice aside from a couple of friends.. and then i'd feel bad about leaving lily, logan and james after what dad did to me.. i'm scared that he'll do the same to one of them..or worse.
7th September 2006, Tomorrow's day of the horse competition... luckily I'll be out of hospital by then, I'm only supposed to be in this god forsaken place for one more night, and then I'll just head straight to the show. If mum and dad actually have a shit they'd probably be warning me how much of a bad idea it is, but obviously as neither of them really give a crap they don't care, they just want me to stay out of the way. I reckon they've enjoyed not having me around for last night and the whole of today... they haven't even been in to see me but I didn't expect them to either. I've got this real sweet nurse looking after me called Daisy, she's only a few years older than me, but .. she's so maternal. It's weird.. she treats me like I'd expect a mum to, even if my mum's never treated me like that before... sometimes she could treat Lily or Logan like that, but I think with me being the louder one, the 'troublesome' one I was never going to get that treatment or affection from her. Still it was weird to have this stranger act so sweet to me... she's always preppy and smiling and chatting away with me. I've tried flirting a little but she laughs it off and says I'm too young for her... I don't want to get with her I'm just having a laugh, but It's nice.
For once I feel safe. It's just so surreal... being here. I hate hospitals, I keep begging to go, but at the same time I think the weird feeling of security here, which I think is why I don't like being here, because I never feel safe, never think I should feel safe because my parent's are still out there, there's no time to think 'safe'... I don't know. Still, Lily and Logan and James turned up with grapes, a motor mag and hung around for a laugh. I was feeling pretty crappy at the time so I was glad they came, they cheered me up and it was nice to see them and all. Luke even came for a bit and we somehow managed to get along... They were here until nurse Daisey came back and said they needed to give me some rest. Fair enough though, the pain meds they have me on make me drowsy, even if they're already weening me off for tomorrow. She checked my burns and such, and I saw Lily wince when she caught sight of them upon leaving.. apparently some of them might scar a little, on my left forearm and lower back, by my left hip but other than that they're actually already healing well enough to fade over time thankfully.
It's been a dull day really aside from the siblings coming, a few people trickled in and out to see me, a few girls I kind of know, then some lads from school. It was a laugh, then the siblings came back for the last hour of the visiting hours allowed, to play cards with me and stuff before the 'rents dragged them home for the night. I ignored dad entirely... no way did he want to say me, and if he thinks I will ever forgive him for it, he's poorly mistaken. Still, Daisy kept me company for a bit before lights out... it's weird, I'm quite a sociable guy, I like people, and being in a ward by myself is just odd...I like my time alone and all, but I prefer people more, still, I'm writing this my the light of this torch Lily gave me a few years back, and now it's getting later I should probably head to sleep. Tomorrow's the big day I guess. Lily said that she's been riding the horse a little, they've bonded enough to get along and do some basics and such... and if she hasn't she said Logan's been lunging him to keep him ready and exercised... but I haven't ridden him in several days so tomorrow is really going to be interesting. I reckon we can win... I know we can..
12th September 2006, I know this isn't Leo writing in here, you'd probably notice because my writing's neater than his, but I had to write in here, I feel like it's the only way to help you right now brother. I'm scared, Leo, I'm so scared for you. I'm sure I'm not hiding it very well regardless, but right now you can't see it anyway, but I feel you should know. I hope you don't hate me for writing in here if when you wake up and find out, but when it was suggested by the nurses that we bring in some clean things for you, and some personal items in case you woke up soon I knew you'd want this. You can say it's pansy all you like but I know that you like writing in here. I promise I didn't read anything. It's your privacy, I would never invade it. I just felt I had to write here.
Maybe I'm making no sense and for that I'm sorry, but you have to wake up Leo. You're my brother - my big brother by about three minutes - but I need you, Logan needs you...hell, James, Luke, Chris and Ash all need you too. It's so scary, sitting by your bedside, watching your chest just to make sure you're still breathing, seeing how still and quiet you are when you should be making fun at us for being so sullen. I hate seeing all these drips and monitors but at least I know that their noise means you're getting better. You have to pull through, there's no other option for you Leo or I swear I'll drag you back and put you six feet under myself. You know I will, 'I'm just that bad ass' as you would say, right?
It feels wrong even trying to make jokes, but I know if I don't you'll roll your eyes at me for it later. I'm sure you would love to know that Kalona's okay, and physically he is..he got off lighter than you, a lot lighter. He won't let anyone near him though, I tried Leo and I couldn't...and part of me doesn't want to either. He scares me, after what happened...after watching the way he spooked, the way you both went down and his whole body just...right onto you. God I'm so sorry. I just need you to get better now, to wake up. Everyone's here - Logan, James, Luke..even some girl called Natasha who I assume is your latest bit of skirt? Honestly Leo pick something a little more classy next time? She's got less brains than a marshmallow, which I guess is why you pick them. I'm sorry ... and I know you'll hate me for saying it, you always used to joke about how you'd hate people to just cry all the time if something happened to you. But I can cry because you're not going to die, you're going to wake up. You have to.
Lily xox
<3 LUCAS JACOB COLE | THREE DAUGHTERS (ROSE, FELICITY, CLAIRE) | ONE SON (SLADE) THREE HORSES (SAFFRON, REBEL, ADONIS)
20th September 2006, Where to start. This will probably be brief, my family have barely left my side and I'm lucky to have these few minutes to myself to write in here. As you probably gathered, the show didn't go well. I don't really remember exactly what happened, it's a bit of a blur and as soon as I hit my head hat or no hat that was that. It was going well, kalona was on edge but he was flying and we were racing toward first place.. And I don't know what did it but suddenly he was freaking out and it was too late to pull out of the approach and then I was falling and I just remember feeling this great weight fall on me, the impact made me smack my head and then it all goes dark. I can half remember voices and being moved and pain.. Lots of pain. I didn't even realise it had been so long when I woke up, wondered why everyone was freaking out so much about me being awake. They were all there - even mum and dad. It was so surreal.
They told me what happened, at first I didn't remember anything but it keeps coming back a little. It sounded gruesome to me but at the time it wasn't like I really knew what was happening. The doctor came in to tell me the extent of everything. No wonder I feel like I'm a useless lump right now. I broke my left arm, my left thigh bone, three ribs, two fingers and one toe... As well as shattering my left hip. I was told I'd suffered internal bleeding and a massive knock to the head and I'm bruised battered and riddled with new scars. But I'm alive. Lucky me. Everything either hurts like a mother .. Or I can't feel anything at all thanks to the meds.
I hate this. I've been awake two days and I hate this. I can barely move right now, I'm tired all the time, everyone's acting like I'm dying, they're there all the time and I love them but I feel so crowded, so penned in. I want out already, and yet they keep saying it'll be weeks before I can even get up, before I can walk, months before I can try and ride - months of pain and hard work and how am I supposed to protect my family if I can't walk. They're so scared for me and I have to pretend I'm fine so they don't worry so much. I just want out of this, and knowing how much longer I have here makes it all that much worse.
