[JOHN EOIN RYAN]

IDK 2015 • outfit • JAKE MICHEAL RYAN Marie Iylah Ryan BENJAMIN CHARLIE RYAN

John had gotten the call that no parent ever wants to hear - one of his kids was in the hospital. He didn't remember anything after dropping the phone. It had been the fast dismount he had ever done and he screamed at one of the grooms to come take his horse. The man had managed to get some barking orders out at them, his most senior groom picking up that something was wrong and quickly took the horse, telling him to go on ahead and he would take care of the youngings. Someone had tossed him his cell, and he was out of the arena and heading to the SUV as fast as his legs could take him. It had just been him at the barn today, and decided that he would call Marie on the way to the hospital.

Igniting the engine, John haphazardly backed the SUV up before speeding off. He didn't give a fuck about rules or speed limits that day, "Siri, call Marie." He barked at his bluetooth, the ringing playing over his speakers before it want to voicemail, "Marie. It's John. I don't know if you've heard from Ben but Jake's at the hospital. He's been in a riding accident. I'm heading there now." And just like that, he hung up, the stress already getting the best of him. He had been in countless situations in his career where he had never lost his cool, but this proved to be difficult. No parent ever wanted to see anything happen to their kid, heck, the cancer had been rough as it was, now this?

He cut someone off, pulling hard into the hospital parking lot and barely getting a parking job done before killing the engine, and sprinting inside to the ER. Already some nurses intervene, saying he couldn't go back there and he had to remain in the waiting room, "My fucking son is behind those doors. You can't fucking call me to tell me that he was in a riding accident and then not fucking let me see him!" His voice grew with every word, John knew he was starting to cause a scene, but he didn't care. The man didn't care to be his calm, collected, cool self right now, he just wanted answers and nobody seemed to be giving them. The poor nurses looked determine to fend him off.

John was getting ready to let loose into them before a voice cut in, "Mr. Ryan?" Blue eyes cut to the owner of the voice, looking wild, "Your other son Ben is here, but he is not a blood match to Jake. We will need blood soon given the loss Jake has experienced and...Mr. Ryan, are you okay?" The blood must have drained from his face, John thought he was going to faint by those words. Blood loss. Jake was going to need blood. What else where they not telling him then, "Take mine. I'm O." He managed, glancing the door, practically willing Marie to walk through those doors so that she could come back with him. How the hell did Ben get here before him?

whatever it takes 'cause I love the adrenaline in my veins

thanks aofie!

[Marie Iylah Ryan]

Marie sat in her office, the smiling faces of ladies she'd met while on the circuit in little boxes on her monitor as she was in the middle of her weekly gaggle session, talking about horses. A number of the ladies, like herself, were no longer on the circuit, but like her still worked with horses, and other were still competitive riders. She frowned as once again she felt that she was forgetting something, a feeling that had been nagging at her since she had sat down.

Unable to shake off the feeling, and also unable to properly join in the conversation, she reached down to pick up her phone, knowing that everything would be in her diary in there, and almost dropped it as the damn thing shook in her hand. She blew out a breath, realising she hadn't turned the sound back on after her ride earlier. She frowned as she looked at the screen, seeing she had missed a call from Ben. "Is everything alright, Marie?" She smiled at her camera. "It's nothing." She replied, turning the sound back on. "I missed a call from my son. I'll call him back when we've finished here."

No sooner had the zoom call finished, then Marie's cell rang. "Marie. It's John. I don't know if you've heard from Ben but Jake's at the hospital. He's been in a riding accident. I'm heading there now." Her breath came in gasps as she stared at the phone, then she shook her head as she grabbed her bag and raced out to her vehicle. She pushed her panic to the background as she put all her focus into getting to the hospital, even if she ignored the speed limit all the way there.

"John!" She cried as she ran in, carrying her stupid long boots, that so we're designed to run in. "What's going on? Where's Ben?" Yes, Jake had been in an accident, but the doctors were seeing to him. What about her other baby? He must have been there when it happened and now he was all alone.

BENJAMIN CHARLIE RYAN, JAKE MICHEAL RYAN

[JAKE MICHEAL RYAN]

BENJAMIN CHARLIE RYAN & RILEY JAMES RYAN & JOHN EOIN RYAN & Marie Iylah Ryan

how he'd gotten from the cross country course to the hospital, he couldn't remember. he'd been riding with his brother, challenging him to a timed run to challenge himself, to see if colarado still had the gumption he'd had when jake had been showing him full time and he'd been going brilliant, until he hadn't. the usual steady horse had baulked at a tiger trap, something they'd jumped before and jake hadn't been expecting it. he'd been too cocky to. had he been riding shade or even cleo, he'd have been more ready but he often found himself getting complacent while on the back of his usually rock-solid mount, but he should have known better.

now he was laying in a hospital bed, the stark surroundings a far cry from the woods he'd been in just hours ago without a care in the world. he'd tried listening to the nurses and the doctors but he couldn't focus on them, their faces were a blur, their voices sounded like they were talking to him through a dozen sheets of glass and all he really knew was what they were pumping into him wasn't making him feel any better. the pain was ever present, the left side of his chest felt like it was caving in every time he took a shallow breath in, unable to take anything deeper, even with the mask they had strapped onto his face.

the one thing he was sure of was that his brother was there, he could hear his voice, feel his presence close to him. it felt stupid to think that but it's all he could call it. he was glad he was there because there was no denying that he was scared. none of the faces around him looked anything but worried and even in his half out of it state, he could tell it wasn't good. he knew they wanted to operate on him, he'd heard that much but he still couldn't tell anyone why, the words ruptured spleen just weren't sinking in. he could feel the broken ribs, he knew they were there. how could he not, but they masked anything else he might have been feeling.

he watched one of the nurses replace a bag of red liquid on the line that was hanging just above his head and he closed his eyes for a second before he turned his head in the direction that he hoped his brother was. if they wanted him to have surgery, he couldn't do it until he'd seen the one person that he kept seeing in his head. the one face he was scared that he'd never see again. his daughter, maddie. only a baby, she was his whole world and if they thought there was a chance he might not make it out of this (even though those words hadn't been said, he just couldn't let it go) he needed to see her. "ben." he rasped out, the mask muffling his voice a little. "maddie.." he said it more as a question than just a name, hoping his brother got the message and quickly. his eyes flickered to the door as another nurse came into the room, though she didn't appear to be here for him so he didn't pay much attention to her, he just let himself drift out of focus as the nurse told his brother that their parents were here.

[BENJAMIN CHARLIE RYAN]

What had started out as a normal day, had turned into some kind of nightmare. It had started out the usual fun and games with his brother - though sometimes he did have to bite back a sigh and a shake of his head when it came to his brother and his competitive streak. Ben had one, considering he competed frequently, but his aim wasn't just to win - it was to have a good round, it was to bring his horse home safe, and hopefully himself. It was to enjoy the day. It was nothing compared to Jake's streak though - Ben's was muted and about three times the size of Jake's competitive spirit. Still, he didn't mind having a play and dealing with the ribbing or the sulking depending on who won. Usually, nobody got hurt. Very occasionally, something stupid happened. But this never did. They had grown up on horseback, they knew horses and they knew how to ride, but for whatever reason, today luck had not been on Jake's side.

It had been horrific to watch, and even more horrific to have to handle it. But he'd had to keep his head cool to be able to do everything right, and fast. It was all a blur, from the accident to suddenly being in the hospital. Ben blinked, staring down at his hands and not even seeing the blood that covered them. His brother's blood. They'd tried to get him to leave, but he'd refused. As soon as his brother had come out of surgery he had insisted on sitting in his room until he woke, he needed to watch over him - it was his job. Waiting had been bad enough, worse when he'd tried to call his parents and not gotten a response to let them know what had happened. He had spoken with the doctor once he'd arrived, finding out that they needed to take him under the knife for internal damages, and then they'd asked Ben to be tested for blood type. He hadn't been a match. A surprise to Ben, he had clearly wrongly assumed that he automatically would be a match, given this was his brother, but now wasn't the time to think about it.

Then he saw his brother's eyes open and he sat up abruptly, ignoring the screaming of his back as he did so. "Jake?" He spoke, almost sharply, partly due to the fear. "ben." A flicker of a smile in relief. "Yeah, it's me." He said quickly, reaching out to take his hand and give it a careful squeeze. "maddie.." He nodded, "She's fine, she's okay I promise." He'd made the necessary calls whilst waiting on his brother, to ensure his daughter was looked after properly. "I'll be back in a sec," He promised, seeing his brother start to nod back off, and wanting to let his parents know what was going on now he had seen Jake wake. He headed out of the room, peering down the hall before heading to the waiting room to find the rest of them. "Mum? Dad?"

[JOHN EOIN RYAN]

IDK 2015 • outfit • Marie Iylah Ryan JAKE MICHEAL RYAN BENJAMIN CHARLIE RYAN

His willing must have worked, because as the nurse walked off to go make the preparations for giving blood, his Marie walked right through the doors of the emergency room, "John!" She cried as she ran in, "What's going on? Where's Ben?" The look of anguish on her face and the worry in her voice hurt him just as much as getting the news over the phone about Jake. He didn't bother calling back to her, he quickly turned and made his way to her now, shorting the distance between the two of them before they met, "Marie, thank god you made it." Fuck, John wasn't sure if he would be able to handle this day without her. And honestly, they would need to referee each other when it came to dealing with the doctors or even Ben. That much he knew.

Her questions though, those were a lot harder to answer, "I barely remember the phone call from the hospital," he answered truthfully. It almost felt like a blur, but John still grasped what the strings he could, "I don't have the full story yet. I just know there was a riding accident. And they just told me they need more blood," his voice waivered a little bit, before he managed to get it together, "Ben's here apparently. The nurse told me he wasn't a match for Jake's so they're going to take mine." In the back of his mind, it suddenly occurred to John why his other son wasn't a match, but that hardly seemed important. A fact long forgotten by time.

John wasn't sure what else to say at that moment. Thankfully though, he heard yet another familiar voice, "Mum? Dad?" Blue eyes glanced over to see none other than Ben, who looked completely unscathed. Thank god, at least that was one less thing to worry about, "Ben!" Unable to hide the worry from his voice, he beckoned his son to come over to them now, "What is going on? I'm being prepped soon to give blood to Jake." It suddenly occurred to him that he probably should ask if Ben himself was okay, but figured he would leave that to Marie and her mothering skills.

whatever it takes 'cause I love the adrenaline in my veins

thanks aofie!

[Marie Iylah Ryan]

"Marie, thank god you made it." Duh! Marie nodded, her mind was working at full speed, trying to take in everything.

She slipped her hand into her husband's as he spoke, needing the physical contact, without clinging to him, as she had a fragile hold on her emotions and that hold would snap if she allowed herself to give them any attention.

"Mum? Dad?" She turned, releasing John's hand, and opened her arms to her son, shivering slightly as John spoke about giving blood. Yes, she helped mare's give birth, but human blood was a totally different thing. "With all the coffee you drink, are you sure your blood isn't going to give him a caffeine high?" She gave a half smile, knowing that this wasn't really a joking matter, but she was barely hanging on here. And, at least knowing where the blood came from, told them that it was clean. "Are you alright?" She asked Ben, her eyes moved over him, making sure that nothing was out of place and using that mother intuition to make sure he wasn't trying to hide any hidden injuries from her. "How's your brother?" At least his answers would be in plain English, rather than something hidden behind technical medical talk.

JAKE MICHEAL RYAN BENJAMIN CHARLIE RYAN JOHN EOIN RYAN

[BENJAMIN CHARLIE RYAN]

He hurried down the isle towards his parents, his heart full of worry for his brother, even as his brain nudged away at him as to why he couldn't help his brother, why he couldn't offer a vein. He needed to be calm in this moment though, to be strong for his mum and dad, who both looked like they'd already been through hell. It was hard enough being there during the accident, seeing it happen, but it was even worse just hearing about it from the other end of the phone - a distant call. "Ben!" He was already on his way as his dad waved him over but he put on a bit of a faster pace for his benefit. "What is going on? I'm being prepped soon to give blood to Jake." Ben heard his dad ask as he was enveloped in his mother's arms. They didn't hug all that often which made it all the more comforting when they did. He extracted himself from her hold so he could explain what was going on, try to ease things as much as he could.

"There was a riding accident. We were messing around on the cross country, you know how Jake loves a competition..." Why did it feel like Ben was about to be blamed for this. It was nobody's fault, things happened, and you couldn't tell Jake shit that was for sure, but maybe he should have told him to slow down, he should have been slower himself to make the competition easier, he shouldn't have encouraged him. "He hit a jump wrong and they had a rotational. The horse seems okay, got up pretty quick, but he rolled over Jake and ...there was a lot of blood .." He shuddered at the image that passed through his head. "He needs a transfusion and apparently I'm not a match. I don't understand... But I can't help him." "Are you alright? How's your brother?" He nodded. "I'm fine. Jake's okay, he's just coming round. The doctor's wouldn't tell me that much." Even though he made a point of looking as together as he could, they didn't seem to want to overwhelm him or concern him, just kept saying things would be fine and all that useless rubbish.

[JOHN EOIN RYAN]

IDK 2015 • outfit • Marie Iylah Ryan BENJAMIN CHARLIE RYAN

Even in the horridness of the moment, Marie still managed to make him smile with her caffeine high comment. A small, dry laugh escaped him now, "Maybe it will give him the jump start that he needs." John replied now, before leaning over and kissing the top of her head. It was pretty much all that he could do to keep himself calm now, given that being bull headed and hysterical didn't appear to work in hospitals. Although all of that came to a halt with their other son's appearance. John had so many questions that he wanted to throw at his oldest son, but leave it to his wife to take over the questioning in a calming matter despite everything going on, and managing to make sure that Ben's feelings were not overlooked as well.

The man cringed inwardly that he had forgotten to ask his son how he was doing, unlike Marie, who had made it her first priority before asking about the situation. He would have to chalk it up to panic, and perhaps, after all of this was done, he would apologize for it. But later. Right now, Ben's explanation was far more important to him: "There was a riding accident. We were messing around on the cross country, you know how Jake loves a competition...He hit a jump wrong and they had a rotational. The horse seems okay, got up pretty quick, but he rolled over Jake and ...there was a lot of blood .." John could feel the blood drain from his face, figures it would be some stupidly brotherly competition that would cause them to be in this mess.

He closed his blue eyes, a sigh escaping him as he ran a hand through his hair, trying to rein his emotions in. Everyone knew Jake was like this, but Ben especially did. The two of them were always up to trouble, and it took everything in John's power to not lay into him. Truth was, John hadn't even realized that the boys had been out on the cross country field, and he was certain, neither did Marie or any of the grooms, "I always tell you two to be careful out there..." was literally all what he could manage. Maybe the truth was that it was the horse's fault, but at the same time, the rider also had to take care of the take off, the pacing, everything, and John was having a hard time not putting fault into both Ben and Jake in the moment.

The next statement caught him a little off guard though: "He needs a transfusion and apparently I'm not a match. I don't understand... But I can't help him." Well shit. That was another topic in the making, one that John didn't want to deal with right now since it didn't matter nor was it the right time. It was one of those situations that the man realized that perhaps they should have brought up ages ago, but it never felt like the right time and he never saw how it could hurt anyone. Clearly, life decided to prove him wrong, "Not everyone is always going to be an exact match to a family member. Don't worry about it, Ben." Hopefully that would placate any suspicions for the time being. Soon enough, a nurse came to grab him and informed him that he needed to get prepped for the transfusion. John simply obliged and nodded, "Stay with your mother, Ben." And he gave his nod to Marie, before following the nurse and leaving his family behind in the waiting room.

whatever it takes 'cause I love the adrenaline in my veins

thanks aofie!

[Marie Iylah Ryan]

Being able to make people smile when they wanted to do anything but seemed to be a superpower of her, and Marie was pleased that it had once again worked. "Maybe it will give him the jump start that he needs." She pursed his lips and nodded. "A blood transfusion that works better than any defib machine."

"There was a riding accident. We were messing around on the cross country, you know how Jake loves a competition...He hit a jump wrong and they had a rotational. The horse seems okay, got up pretty quick, but he rolled over Jake and ...there was a lot of blood .." She winced as she listened, easily able to picture the entire scene - these were the moments that a parent would wish to not be as horsey as their children, at least then she would just be trying to imagine it, not actually know what he was talking about. "I always tell you two to be careful out there..." Now wasn't the time to place blame, at least they were both alive...

"He needs a transfusion and apparently I'm not a match. I don't understand... But I can't help him." Her brows began to lift, until she stopped them. "Not everyone is always going to be an exact match to a family member. Don't worry about it, Ben." She nodded. "The same as any kind of transplant, and their family members aren't a match. It happens." She swore inwardly, but forced herself to remain calm, there would be time to think of their life choices later. "Stay with your mother, Ben." She return her husband's nod, and watched him walk away, rubbing her finger tips against her palms and then wiped her hands on her pants. "Are you sure you're okay?" She asked Ben as she gave him her complete attention, once again doing a visual sweep to make sure he wasn't hiding any pains.

JAKE MICHEAL RYAN BENJAMIN CHARLIE RYAN JOHN EOIN RYAN